Let's start off with a couple questions.
Would you think it appropriate for a woman to deliberately allow her friend's husband to see her in her underwear? How about if she sent her friend's husband a photograph of herself in a bikini or otherwise revealing swimsuit?
No? Really? No? Well then why, pray tell, is it any different for said woman to wear a revealing bathing suit in the presence of her friend's husband? Or any other male she isn't betrothed to, for that matter?
Two years ago, we went to the coast of Florida to visit family. It had been about five years since I had been on a crowded beach. I don't think much had changed during those five years, but I had COMPLETELY forgotten the way many women (and men) dress (or undress) for the beach.
Everywhere I looked, I was looking at skin. To not look at skin would have meant keeping my eyes closed the entire time (making it incredibly difficult to watch my children) or packing up and leaving.
I wanted to pack up and leave.
I didn't want my husband and my son AND my daughters to see what they saw everywhere they looked. But we were on vacation...at the beach. So, I convinced myself that it was normal and that I couldn't shield my family from every indiscretion, so I needed to buck up and get over it.
I hate that.
I hate it when society gets the best of me and I give in to it like some rubber-spined pushover.
One afternoon that week, Sam and I were at the shared pool at our condo. The pool was otherwise empty. We had been to the beach earlier that morning, but at this point Miriam was napping and Sadie and Jamey stayed back with her. Sam and I don't get a lot of total one-on-one time and I was enjoying it. Out of the blue he says to me, "Mommy, I like your bathing suit- how it has a skirt on the bottom and how your chest is covered up. Why do those other ladies wear ones that almost show all of their privatest parts?" This, coming from my (then) seven year old.
Good question, Sam. Of course, I couldn't tell him what I really thought...but one day I will.
That little conversation prompted a new habit for me. Even though my seven year old thought my bathing suit was modest enough, I've started wearing a t-shirt on top. I don't want to (willingly) take part in possibly causing someone to stumble because of my swimwear choice (not that I'm even stumble-worthy). The added benefits are that I'm so much more comfortable not having to worry about being properly covered or about getting sunburn in hard to reach/remember places.
So what brings this rant on now? Well, a friend I admire (thank you, Kimberlee) pointed me to this post.
This woman says everything I couldn't put into words here. Please don't skip the video. It reveals some fascinating research I had not heard before about, you guessed it, bikinis.
Alright. I'm stepping off my soap box. Except to say, we are approaching summer, dear ones. Let's err on the side of being too deliberate...in the non-popular direction.