I have to be honest. The night before we started back to school on January 3rd, after a two and a half week break, I was experiencing some dread. There were 22 weeks of school left. 22! For some reason each year, it seems to me that Christmas break falls in the middle of the school year. But, it does not. And I always forget this until I count up the number of school weeks left and am faced with the reality of it all.
So, what do I dread? A couple things. Just the occasional back-talk, refusal to do work, the painfully slow completion of work that leaves me sitting there thinking of all of the other things I could be doing. I want it to be about me sometimes and homeschooling does not allow a whole lot of time for me.
I've had quite a bit of me time during the past few weeks. Jamey has been home for winter break and even did school with Sam his last three days before his break and a couple days during his first week back. I've had time to bake, reorganize closets, cabinets and entire rooms. I put all our photos on the computer and even have them all made into photo books which are now sitting in Shutterfly-land waiting for me to have enough money to purchase them. I even spent a couple hours one evening making some birthday cards with my neglected supplies. See? Lots of me time. My me time may look different than yours. I function better in an orderly world- it's my stress reliever- both the actual orderliness of the resulting world and the feeling of peace it brings me. Sitting in a tub with bubble bath and candles would just make my eczema flare up.
Now we're back in school. On Monday, Jamey is back on rotations. It's just me, the kids, the schoolbooks, the laundry, the dirty dishes and the hungry mouths. Oh, and yes, I cannot forget the kisses (Miriam still does not know how to kiss with a closed mouth), the smiles, the highly entertaining conversation, the bouts of laughter, the hugs and the occasional 'I get it!' moments in school.
Things will become cluttered and disorganized. Photos will be taken and will live for a long time in my camera. Homemade cards will run out and store bought ones will be sent.
And that's okay.
As much as an adjustment getting back into school can be, this is our life, our choice, a priority for us and I'm willing to sacrifice a little (and some days, an awful lot) of me and peace to live it.